A doctor in Ireland wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant. "Garge, I am goin huntin tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all me patients".

"Yes, sir!" answers Garge.

The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks: "So, Garge, how was your day?"

Garge told him that he took care of three patients. "The first one had a headache so I gave him TYLENOL."

"Bravo, Mate, and the second one?" asks the doctor.

"The second one had stomach burning and I gave him MAALOX, sir,"says Garge.

"Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the doctor.

"Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters. Like a flame, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table. She spreads her legs and shouts: 'HELP ME! For five years I have not seen any man!"

"Thunderin' Lard Jayzus, Garge, what did ye do?" asks the doctor.

"I put drops in her eyes!!"